Happy 6th birthday in Heaven, Zoey!

Happy, Happy, Birthday Zoey girl!

 

I honestly cannot believe it's been six whole years since you made us parents. It's been such a wild ride. It has been full of emotions. It's been full of tears and laughter. I still remember the day you came crashing into our lives like it was yesterday. All of my emotions were placed into full gear that day. I finally realized what being a Mom was about. I remember people telling me about how you love this little person SO much- but honestly it isn't fathomable until you travel down that road for yourself.

I refuse to spend your birthday in a pit of despair. Obviously, I am so, so, sad that you're not here in the physical sense to help us celebrate. But, today, is about celebrating YOU. We celebrate the lessons you taught us- we celebrate becoming parents. We celebrate how much we loved you and still love you.

The day you were born your Daddy and I experienced so many profound emotions. We worried. We loved like we had never loved before. We celebrated. We rejoiced. We prayed and cried. We even laughed at your wild hair to match your equally wild personality.

We're so, so, blessed to have had you- even if God decided that our time with you would be cut abruptly short. There is a Garth Brook's song titled "The Dance" and this song makes me think of you so often. There is a single line, "We could have missed the pain, but we would have had to miss the dance!" It rings so true to me. We are the parents we are to your little sister and brother because of you. I am the friend, mother, sister, daughter, because of lessons your little life taught us. We're forever grateful for you.

Today I wish we all  were united as a family. I wish we were picking you out your favorite cake and singing Happy Birthday to you. However, instead, we remember you. We remember your crazy hair- your crooked bink- your sweet, soft, smells. I remember how you snuggled into our chest. I remember how incredibly brave you were. I remember how you consistently proved everyone wrong.  Memories last forever baby girl.

I am looking forward to the day that we all meet again. I often attempt to picture if you're still a baby in Heaven- or if you're growing up there. I am guessing we'll find out soon enough.

Enjoy your cake. Dance with Jesus. And know that we're loving and missing you always.

Love you to the moon and back,

Mama

Recital Costumes

Disney World

Brenton: You're 18 months old today!

Oh sweet baby. Happy half birthday to you, buddy! It seriously feels like yesterday we were planning your first birthday and here you are half way through your 2^nd year!

We’ve had lots of excitement in the last few months with you. In fact, you’re currently sporting a 103 fever and needing extra loving. Last week you fell off our dining room table chair, onto the ceramic tile, and fractured your forehead.  There is this saying that Mom’s like to say, “Don’t do that or you’ll crack your head open!” And you managed to make that common phrase true. Thankfully, it’s only a hairline fracture and you took it like a true champ- but you look like a battered baby commercial. I can almost see the pity on people’s faces when they see us out and about. Do me a favor and stop climbing on everything. You’re truly making my heart skip a beat.

You’re becoming such a little person. You’re learning new words all the time. Currently, your favorite word is “Bad” and I am assuming you must hear this way too much. Sorry! You know what you want and how to express getting it, even if your vocabulary is still a bit limited. You can follow 3 word directions. You love to help clean (so much so you’re constantly throwing things away that are not trash!). You’re constantly on the go. You never, ever, sit still. We take you to dance each Tuesday for Sissy and you run, run, run. You can be totally exhausting. You climb on everything. And anything. Stop. Thanks!

You’re finally sleeping through the night.  However, you’ve eliminated your morning nap most days and only take one afternoon nap. I remember when your sister did this and it makes me feel like you’re not quite as much as a baby as I still assume you are. You still love your paci and your blankey. In the next few months we’re going to have to start working on you to give up your beloved pacifier.

You’re bright and beautiful and incredibly sweet. You’re vivacious and wild and mischievous. These are the qualities that make my heart explode each time I think of you! You love your Sissy so much, but you’re often instigating her by pulling her hair, taking her baby dolls, and running away giggling. She’s in love with you. Even though you all manage to argue about every 3 seconds (which is incredibly entertaining to watch you tell her off- complete with hand gestures and baby language- and her respond as if she has any idea what you’re actually trying to convey!) I know that your relationship with her will only flourish and you’ll remain the best of friends.

Your smile is contagious. Your laugh is healing. I love you. I love every part of your wildly dysfunctional ways. I love every quirk, every “naughty” moment, and every part of you. You have this ability to make my heart happy when it’s sad. You have this gift of a sweet, curious, soul. I cannot wait to see where the Lord takes you. I cannot see what your perfect little soul brings to this World.  God has big plans for you, Bub, and I cannot wait to watch you achieve each of his goals for you.

 

I love you to the moon and back,

Mama